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Oh Baby You’ll Freeze [in] There


Mrs. Madrigal’s furnace is broken. She paid some unnamed “furnace man” to put in a new furnace, which he did. But it’s the wrong size. And he turned off the gas when he was at the house and never turned it back on – thus leaving us with no hot water for a few days. So the hot water heater man came out and turned the gas back on. Now we have hot water. But still no heat. Because the furnace. It’s the wrong size, you know.

So Mrs. Madrigal is now getting quotes from other furnace men. The one who came this morning said that he can’t put a new furnace in until Monday. At this point I direct your attention to the above graphic, which depicts the forecast for the end of this week. Can you say frozen? Good. You can say it for me then, because once the temperature gets down to 26 degrees I will be unable to say anything.

Mrs. Madrigal is just broken up about this situation. In what will come as a surprise to no one, she has turned to the bottle for solace. The other day, in an attempt to update me on the status of things, she phoned me, but for at least 30 seconds at the beginning of the call, she completely forgot who she had called and just made strange, gutteral sounds of confusion.

Soon, *I* will be turning to the bottle. Anyone who wants to join me should bundle up and come on over.

[Dean Martin/Doris Day lyrics = 1]

{ 11 } Comments

  1. karen | October 14, 2004 at 12:47 pm | Permalink

    Ahem, there are other ways to find a date, Mandy.

  2. Miranda | October 14, 2004 at 12:52 pm | Permalink

    Shivering. Frottage. Call it what you like. As long as I don’t get frostbite…

  3. karen | October 14, 2004 at 1:01 pm | Permalink

    Frottage Cottage!!!!!!!
    Best when served cool.

  4. LD | October 14, 2004 at 4:59 pm | Permalink

    Better fix yourself a hot toddy.

  5. Darx | October 15, 2004 at 7:56 am | Permalink

    I just went to a home repair class on Furnaces and Boilers, but we didn’t learn anything about what to do when they are the wrong size. I think I could identify the thermocoupler for you, given about an hour and probably a cheat sheet.

    May I suggest a space heater, a down comforter turned bathrobe, and 2 pairs of wool socks. Oh and a hat. You’ll definitely be needing a hat.

  6. Rob | October 15, 2004 at 10:11 am | Permalink

    Hey, please feel free to come up Clark Street anytime and hang out in my neck of the woods. It’s warmer and we can drink there. (no Tivo, though). And don’t worry, *my* Mrs. Madrigal is gone for a week, so there will be no shocking back stairwell interactions to fear.

  7. Phantom Dennis | October 15, 2004 at 10:49 am | Permalink

    While not there to join in the pain, I lived it more than vicariously. I got to my hotel and they told me that they didn’t have a non-smoking room with a BED in it. Now I am not a fancy hotel person, and don’t ask for many amentities, just a hot shower and a BED. Let me repeat — NO BED! They were kind enough to bring me a roll-away bed (and then tried to bring me a second one, I guess thinking that two beds would make up for the original lack of a bed) but I just spend the most uncomfortable night I have probably ever spend in a hotel — and just to join you in the misery of the cold — because it was a “Hospitality Suite” I couldn’t get the air conditioning to turn off!

  8. karen | October 15, 2004 at 12:00 pm | Permalink

    checking in to see how you’re doing in the
    polar vortex?

  9. Miranda | October 15, 2004 at 12:13 pm | Permalink

    Chilly! Will probably be vacating for warmer locations this weekend.

  10. mike | October 15, 2004 at 1:01 pm | Permalink

    it’s definitely good to have options

  11. LD | October 15, 2004 at 7:36 pm | Permalink

    This comment board goes to 11.
    Stay warm!

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