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Simon Says “Equal Protection!”

I point you to this quote from a Slate.com article on Lawrence v. Texas, which was argued in the Supreme Court on Wednesday. [via Angst-ident Prone]

So confusing is the argument, as it pings back and forth between due process and equal protection analysis, that at some point Justice Antonin Scalia asks Paul Smith, who represents Lawrence and Garner, to raise his left hand while arguing one track and his right while arguing the other.

Man: Oh, baby, I’m so hot for you. Come here and love me long time.
Woman: I will, sweet cheeks, but first I’ve got to check with Tony Scalia.

Huh? you ask? Try this next bit of Supreme Scalia logic:

“It’s conceded by the state of Texas that married couples can’t be regulated in their private sexual decisions,” says Smith. To which Scalia rejoins, “They may have conceded it, but I haven’t.”

Here is a less snarky take on the argument by Linda Greenhouse over at the NYTimes.

Now who's scared straight?

Want to be truly appalled? Try the Cult of Scalia webpage. People, I could not make this shit up.

Update: Best guestbook entry on the Cult of Scalia website: “Scalia is everything that is wrong with America in the 21st century. Bigotry. Homophobia. Dogmatic Religious views. Extremist dogma. Political influence on the Justice system. Baldness.”

{ 2 } Comments

  1. iggy | March 30, 2003 at 10:43 am | Permalink

    As someone pointed out on Metafilter, you can legally drive without a windshield in Texas ? just not without windshield wipers. I am having a hard time explaining all this to my houseguest from Brazil.

  2. term life insurance | October 7, 2003 at 2:18 am | Permalink

    Interesting.

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